Parenting

You might be wondering what an 18-year-old college student, with no kids knows about parenting. And your right I don’t know much. I obviously have no experience in that department. But I have learned a lot by babysitting and observing different families and seeing what type of parenting works best. I hate to break it to you, but I don’t have the best way to parent every single child. There is just no such thing. Every child will need to be parented a different way. For example, my little brother gets away with a lot of stuff. My parents defiantly don’t go as hard on him as they did on me. It’s not because they love him more it’s because we are different human beings and have different needs and personality characteristics.

There are three different types of parenting. There is the coercive parenting style, permissive and authoritative. The coercive/hostile or authoritarian style of parenting is characterized by parents who deride, demean, or diminish children and teens by continually putting them in their place, putting them down, mocking them, or holding power over them via punitive or psychologically controlling means. This is not a good way to parent. It hurts the kids and make them hate being at home. It has been linked to many forms of antisocial, withdrawn, and delinquent behaviors in children and adolescents. I know that no one wants that for their children. 

Permissive parenting is characterized by parents who overindulge children or neglect them by leaving them to their own devices. This style includes a shrinking of sacred parental responsibilities as parents fail to provide guidance and constraint when it is required for the child’s good. “Modern-day prophets counsel parents to provide and enforce reasonable limits to teach their children the clear bounds of acceptable and unacceptable behavior.” (Successful Marriages and Families). The most important thing you could do as a parent is being there for your children. Showing them that you love them. The permissive parenting does not fit well with the proclamation principles.

The optimal parenting style is the authoritative parenting style. Authoritative parenting fosters a positive emotional connection with children, provides for regulation that places fair and consistent limits on child behavior, and allows for reasonable child autonomy in decision making.  This style creates a positive emotional climate that helps children be more open to parental input and direction and allows for parents to individualize child rearing. President Monson once said “To you who are parents, I say, show love to your children. You know you love them but make certain they know it as well. They are so precious. Let them know. Call upon Heavenly Father for help as you care for their needs each day as you deal with challenges which inevitably come with parenthood. You need more than your own wisdom in rearing them." I love this because it is so true. I have seen families do it this way and their children turn out to be amazing disciples of Christ. 

            Remember that every child is different and will need attention. If you show every single one of your children that you are here for them and you love them, Heavenly Father will help with the rest. 



Thanks for reading. I will see you in the next one, Bye! 



All the information I used in this blog came from a book called Successful Marriages and Families Proclamation Principles and Research Perspectives by Alan J. Hawkins, David C. Dollahite and Thomas W. Draper.